Hello Readers! I am doing some amazingly fantastically cool things in therapy! My therapist Betsy is super rad. I mean Super Rad! I mean when she moved her office, I started driving an hour to see her.
***DO NOT TRY THIS WITHOUT THE ASSISTANTS OF A HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL. THIS IS ONLY AN OVERVIEW OF HOW REPROCESSING MEMORIES WORKS. If you're interested in trying this, Please contact a therapist in your area, or go to your school/place of work and meet with a councilor who can help.***
The past month we've been working on something very awesome, we've been reprocessing my memories. This just means setting a perfectly safe and serene environment for me to go through a memory and see what I feel emotionally, what my body feels, and all the small details.
It's a bit like on Criminal Minds when they take a witness through what they saw, smelled, felt, but a lot safer and slower for my subconscious. It allows me to be super aware of what I feel and what's really happening in the memory, but I don't actually feel unsafe, angry, or hurt. Like you do when you have a crappy day, feel better, explain what happened, and then feel crappy again.
There a few different ways to reprocess memories. First the tools! There's: 2 small tabs that pulse back and forth in your hands, larger tabs that pulse back and forth + have a small light that flashes back and forth, and headphones that beep back and forth in each ear. Now these tools work like background music, but they play a huge part in reprocessing. They better connect both sides of your brain.
What you do is pick your tool(s), pick a place real or made up that you feel calm and safe in. Go there in your a head a few times to really make it solid, and easy to go to. Then use it as a tool to keep you calm while you think of times when you had to deal will small annoyances. Eventually you will be able to work on bigger memories. You can use going to your safe place to keep you feeling sane in every life.
So far we've set up my safe place which is a very special park in Burnsville, The Heart of The City park. It's where I used to run to in the middle of the night as a kid to escape life. And of course I totally brought boys there, and took tons of pictures, and did drawings there. It has all sorts of moving water, lights, and sculptures. The feel of soft grass, smooth rocks, and the sound of water just makes me feel so at peace, alive, and free. It's safety.
We also worked on reprocessing small annoying memories. For me it was this guy in high school who always tapped his pencil during tests, racing against this ass hole to finish tests first, and talking to this girl who so ignorantly voted yes. Next week we'll be working on reprocessing bigger memories. The first time I got sexually assaulted in elementary school, and when these guys I've know my whole life used to call me "Japanese Girl" all through elementary school.
I think this is healthy, and really awesome for your subconscious. If you think this type of therapy could be beneficial for you, please contact a therapist in your area. If you don't have health insurance, or you have poor coverage there are plenty of free clinics. If you go to school (elementary school, middle school, high school, college/grad your school does host councilors for you to talk to. There's also many work places that offer councilors and can set you up with therapists. Cheers!