Say My Name.

Hello Readers. Lee, Kang Sun is my birth name. A name that I have not been called since I was 4 months old in Korea. When will anyone call me that again? 

I've been thinking about my name a lot lately and how I said I was done defending it. But now I'm feeling this new longing for my full birth name to matter. I've never even heard my adoptive parents say it.. 

It's strange for it to be forbidden in the walls of my childhood home, but strangers on the street will ask for my Korean name or whatever I was called before adoption. How can something so secret be assumed open by the public? Don't they get that adoption is not lollipops and sun shine? 

Adoption means birth parents are grieving the loss of a child. It means adoptive parents are grieving the loss of biological love. It means a baby may never see home again.. It means a baby may have to wait till her 16th birthday to go through her adoptive parents' office to find out her real name. Me, I did that.

Why do some adoptees get to have both their names mashed up or their birth name set as their middle name? Why do other adoptees starve to never know?

I'd give anything to hear my mother call me KangSun. It would mean the world for me to hear my mom call me Kang. 

I wish I didn't need these things to feel complete. I wish I was def to this.

Cheers.