Monday 6 July 2015

My Lowest Point: Sexual Abuse Addiction & Abuse.

Hello Readers. One year ago, America' birthday, I was left laying in a parking lot, crying, half naked, and heartbroken. This was the lowest weekend of my life as an abused sex addict. I was at CONvergence 2014.

**Friday** Double D was wasted, flirting, and sexually assaulting girls. I went off to hang elsewhere. I met 3 different guys, nailed them in their hotel rooms, and snuck out on each one to go meet the next.

**Saturday** I was nailing strangers in my car. I was introduced to a Korean guy, we flirted, Double D saw, and.. He made a very public example out of me. So there I was paralyzed on the pavement, my arms scraped on loose gravel, and after a while I was out of tears.. I finally got up and I went straight to my friends' hotel room. Then a long time buddy stopped by, I cried in his arms, I calmed down, and we hooked up.

We all went out to the party rooms. I danced with a stranger, made out with him, and later met him to screw in my car too. At one point mid hook up, a guy walked up to us in the parking lot.. He asked if he could watch.. The stranger I was nailing grabbed his clothes and ran! Sure we were complete strangers, but what about human to human safety?

The guy asking to watch was a tall Midwestern type, considerably taller and stronger than me.. I was scared. He'd had already exposed himself.. I offered to let him choke me while he finished, in exchange for my "greater safety". He pushed me, pinned my neck up against the open door frame, and just made me dangle until he was done. I cried in my car and went home.

***

I officially started being meaningless sex free and abuse free NYE 2015, Thanks B.
I relapsed both on April 26th.
I have been meaningless sex free since April 27th, and abuse free since April 30th.

I am living healthy, happy, and balanced.

*Cheers*

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